Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Little Flame (Poem)

As some of the lines from this poem had been tweeted yesterday, it's time to re-post it in my blog. Enjoy!



+ + +

I have a little flame
At the center of my heart
I know how it got there
God was the very start

+ + +

One little flame
In a vast dark place
One little smile
That won't be displaced

+ + +

Light a flame beside me
Hence there are two
It's now a little brighter
We know what to do

+ + +


+ + +

It could be a smile
Or a helping hand
All the different ways
As countless as sand

+ + +

Pass on a kindness
Or uplifting word
Light another flame
Against this dark world

+ + +

Like little ripples
On the surface of a pond
Little flames alight
When the heart is fond

+ + +

Ever-widening circles
Spread the Light and Love
As our little flames
Reflect the One Above

+ + +

Further and further
Light this shining ball!
One little flame
Can encompass us all

+ + +

When the darkness comes
To blow our flames out
There is one thing that
It hasn't figured out

+ + +

Within each heart
A little flame is found
And with a some effort
We can send it back around!

+ + +

- ESA


PS: Feel free to copy, re-post or share freely, provided you do not receive funds in doing so.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

My Sister, the Camel

At times, the hardest people to forgive are those closest to us, such as a family member. We argue that we know them too well and that they will never change. Who are we to say "never?"

I continue to struggle with my feelings about my sister. (Yes, that picture is actually us, six years apart in age.)

For two nights in a row, I've had dreams that involved the grudge I have against my little sister. Given that my Twitter account lists me as "His (Jesus') Little Sister," who certainly needs His forgiveness, why is it so hard to forgive my own little sister and look past some of the things she says and does? 

I will admit, there is a lot of jealousies, almost all on my side. I was the oldest child in the family, the one who had to help my parents and was responsible for my three younger siblings. She was the youngest and got away with everything.

My parents had very little income as I grew up; I've shoveled snow, babysat, and delivered papers since I was 10 to pay for each treat. When I was in high-school, my father landed a lucrative means of income, and my sister got everything for which she asked without having to work for it.

I worked 20-70 hours per week since I was 16. While fortunate enough to have some of my college expenses paid (I know many who never had that chance), I worked in the college cafeteria 35-hours per week to help cover the rest of my bills, and up to 70 hours over the summer with all the work I could find. In college, my sister rode on coat-tails of luxury and had an off-campus apartment paid for by my parents. She would take summers off because she "worked" so hard in school, including three years at law school, which was also covered in full.
As young adults, the divide only grew. I've struggled to pay bills in lower-income brackets where "vacation" was a 3-day weekend at a friend's house. My sister landed high-income jobs from the start and has gone on at least one (up to three) cruise(s) per year.
Having little means myself, I grew up to have a heart for others who have little and give as often as I could, in time, money or from my own closet. My sister on the other hand, will frequently gripe about the "hand outs" and "free ride" those that are on social support receive.

She bitched about the "free cell phones" where recycled old phones were reprogrammed so homeless and poor could dial "911" in an emergency. Yet, in her mind, they were calling long distance to yak for hours on end with their relatives.

She derides people on food stamps, believing "they should just go out and work for a living like I do." My sister has never been hungry in her life; I've had several weeks with only generic cereal (dry) and cheap generic spaghetti. Once, I even had a stretch where I had to rely on the kindness of strangers to supply one good meal a day; I worked three part-time jobs at the time. I've even been homeless once, and was blessed as a friend took me in for a few months until I could get another place.
Her most recent rant involves the FHA loan (where government helps low-income households purchase a home). Last year she sold her 3-bedroom house with a finished basement to upgrade to one of those McMansions that bloomed everywhere in the market boom. The family that purchased her old home financed through FHA, and she recently heard from a former neighbor that they were painting the home. Not any major remodeling, mind you, just a fresh coat of paint. She went on a lengthy tirade how the government shouldn't be supplementing mortgages for people who could afford to do that! In fact, they shouldn't support people at all. Let them work for a living, like she does. She didn't even realize that her rants were presented to two people who have yet to afford their first home - even with FHA financing...
My sister had one of the first of my nieces and nephews; I've never been blessed with kids of my own but so desperately wanted one.

Having low income, I hand-crafted teddy bears, hidden-pocket pillows and other unique gifts for the kids, but those gifts were often left behind compared to the X-box games and other high-end gifts that I could never give anyone, including myself.

Matters only became more estranged when my parents announced that the grandchildren would inherit everything after they were gone. To this day my sister strives to have even more kids after the first two; part of me wonders if this is to get a larger portion of the estate once my mother is gone... She even had the audacity to ask my husband and I - the childless couple with little income - to donate money into a fund to help her adopt kids from overseas! Then she requested that we ask our friends for money too.
While we are sisters, we are completely different people. She sees others as  people she could use to help better either her status (networking) or her life (by them serving her). I see people as my brothers and sisters whom I am called to help.

Though, I do find it harder to relate to people who have so little kindness for the least of us; and the more wealth they seem to have, the less they seem to care about others. I don't hate them, I don't think I truly could hate anyone. But I do become angry, and afterwards I feel sad for them; they just don't "get it."

Perhaps that's why Yeshua/Jesus taught that it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of the needle, than for the rich to enter the Kingdom. This is true, and it is those for whom we should pray. They are blind and they need His healing to help them see...

This past Christmas, we exchanged the typical "wish lists" among the family. Instead of what I would like under the tree, I created a list of charities, such as food banks, Samaritan's Purse and similar humanitarian aid organizations to which my husband and I would like to contribute more, if we had the means.

The rest of my family got me gift certificates to restaurants and things not on that list. My sister was the only one who made a donation in my name to one of the agencies. There is hope.

Recently, my sister took her family on a cruise. On Easter morning, she was out on a land excursion in San Juan and heading out to breakfast with her family. She spied a hungry homeless person on the street near the restaurant and purchased a hot meal and coffee for him. There is hope...

I strive to be the best example for her in this life; I am her big sister after all. That, and I need to forgive her. She's said and done some rotten things about others in her past. She likely will do so in the future; it takes time for some to change. But if I continue to forgive her, to pray for her, to shine a good example for her, hopefully she will begin to hear the Spirit within her as well. And change...

There is hope
Always
:*)

~ESA

Saturday, April 14, 2012

Healing

Some of you may have seen yesterday's tweets that I have no more pain. Some of those I've touched base with over my hiatus know some of what was going on. While I don't normally do so in this blog, I'd like to share with my readers what happened. This is a very real, and very personal experience.
Last summer, due to medical complications and high levels of pain from ovarian cysts and other issues with my reproductive organs, I had a full hysterectomy. While on the mend, I developed what many believe was the "routine" UTI (bladder infections) that follow a hysterectomy. I was given my dosage of anti-biotics and told to drink plenty of fluids, including sage use of cranberry juice.
The pain continued - and worsened - over the next few months. They kept giving me anti-biotics at increasing doses, even though the cultures were coming back negative. The doctors kept offering me pain killers, but I wanted to find out what was wrong, not just "be more comfortable." I went through a battery of tests and, finally admitting they had no clue, I was sent to a urologist. The cystoscopy, where they shove a pencil sized camera into my bladder was agony! I had no pain-killers at all in my system, and not even a "local" for the procedure. Despite what courage I could muster, I was howling with tears streaming down my cheeks every time I urinated for several weeks thereafter.
After more tests, the urologist finally diagnosed the problem: Interstitial Cystitis / Painful Bladder Syndrome (IC/PBS). While there are many possible ways to get this condition, mine was likely caused by the recent "trauma" to my bladder during the hysterectomy, where they had to "peel" the uterus from the bladder. It's also a condition that is often misdiagnosed, as mine had been, but not discovered for an average of FOUR YEARS!  I had mine discovered in three months, mostly because I kept insisting they find the issue and stop trying to give me pain meds to cover up the symptoms.
According to Wikipedia, it's a "chronic, oftentimes severely debilitating disease of the urinary bladder" and is officially recognized as a disability. While I wasn't about to leave work, I at least had the diagnosis and was ready for the cure.
There is none.
Apparently, this condition only worsens with anti-biotics, pain medications and a seven-page list (I wish I was kidding!) of foods, seasonings and other items that irritate a IC/PBS bladder. There was some bladder-friendly foods, though, and I needed to change my diet dramatically and promptly. This, unfortunately would mean months to soothe the bladder, and my diet would be an unhealthy high white-starch, low vegetable, no fruit diet. Yes, cranberry juice was at the top of the "Do not have" list, as was caffeine (even decaf), chocolate, fruits, spicy foods, and many other things I enjoy.
The diet commenced at the start of December; egg nog, Christmas cookies and chocolate were no longer on my list of edibles. In fact, with such a restricted list, plus having to run to restroom every 15-30 minutes to grit my teeth during frequent, painful urinations, I had to cancel all business travel as well. This condition was certainly disrupting my life. And I prayed each day to be healed. I still had to wait...
Starting in late January, while the pain was there but finally starting to ease, a new condition arose. My hands started to hurt, and the bones in my feet. Then my wrists and ankles hurt, feeling more and more like arthritis. I'm only 42! My knees took on a whole new kind of agony; in weeks I could no longer walk up and down stairs without taking it one step at a time while biting back cries of pain and clinging to the railing. Then my shoulders ached so I couldn't sleep at night. Finally my back and neck joined the chorus and I was in miserable agony all over.
I had no option of taking pain killers to alleviate any of this.
It was then that I reached out to some I know on Twitter, asking for their prayers as well. I needed help, and I was beginning to wonder if God was ever going to get me through this pain. Just a small doubt, but it was there. I needed my brothers and sisters to help me as my faith started to flag.
I have this image on a medallion around my neck. It's a constant reminder that I need to trust God. I need to trust Yeshua/Jesus. There was a plan in place and while I could not see it, I had to have a bit more faith.
It was discovered about a month later that the joint pain was caused by vitamin deficiency from my IC/PBS diet. Vitamin supplements were not allowed by the diet. I had a choice: break the diet by taking supplements or by eating prohibited food - both of which would cause more pain in the bladder. Either way I was in pain, but if I got rid of the joint pain, I could still work - heck! I could still WALK!
Given the body better absorbs vitamins via the food instead of supplements, I opted to re-introduce certain foods into the diet; this was a daily dose of orange juice. The vitamin-rich drink did wonders for easing the joint pain, but made me dread urination. It was a battle of what hurt more, urinating or the pain of a full bladder. The pain in my joints didn't disappear completely either, but I could still function at my desk job.
I continued to pray.
Ironically, white rice was on my "permitted foods" list, so I was able to have my 1-rice-ball-per-day-plus-dinner fast for the 40-day period of Lent. Near the end, I started to add a handful of peanuts to the rice ball as I started having tremors in my limbs. I continued the orange juice every-other day as daily hurt the bladder WAY too much to endure.
Then the day after Palm Sunday - the Monday of Holy Week - I was told to have some faith that all this pain would end soon. "Soon" is a relative term, my mind argued. So I was given something more specific. As it was around sunset that day, I was told give it one week - until sunset next Monday (day after Easter).
That Monday, I was still in pain. I had been "bad" on the diet, for I had eaten a few black jelly beans Easter Day, and added an even worse offense that morning: coffee so I could get through the very busy day ahead of me. My joints hurt from both the condition and scrubbing down the 10-burner kitchen stove at the church following the Sunrise Service breakfast. My knees were in agony anytime I needed to go up and down stairs and grumbled, popped, cracked and crackled as I walked. My hands hurt when I held a stack of paperwork or used the computer mouse too long. At the end of the day, I had also developed a vicious sinus headache that equaled a few migraines I've had. My left eye - my only good eye as I'm legally blind in the right - was squinted shut with the pain and sensitivity to light. My upper teeth ached, as I minced my way through dinner. Then I crawled into bed.
Through all this, I never forgot the promise that if I had even a little bit of faith in Him, that all this pain would go away. My mind argued, that if I was so bad with this diet, that if my joints still hurt so bad, plus this wicked headache on top if it all, how can I possibly be pain-free by sunset that day?
The words, "Trust me; just TRUST me," kept bouncing through my head. I lay in bed watching cartoons at low volume to try to distract my mind from the pain and quiet myself enough to sleep. I also prayed... and held on to the smallest scrap of faith I had left. My eyes closed to sleep just as the sun disappeared beyond the horizon.
The next morning I awoke to a wondrous surprise - no pain! At all! There was no pain in the full bladder; there was no pain urinating! I was still half-asleep so I didn't realize right away that there was also no pain in any of my body - joints, limbs, head - anywhere! It was truly and remarkably ALL gone!
Tuesday, I had three (3) cups of coffee and orange juice - no pain! I could go up and down stairs without any issue! In fact, I could plant one-foot-per-step rather than both-feet-per-step as I had done. By the end of the work-day, I was practically dancing up and down the stairs in the office building! I attended yoga that night, where my knees cracked loudly once but had their full range back like I had when I was 20! In fact - the whole day was entirely PAIN FREE!
Wondering if this was some fluke, I waited until Wednesday. Again - there was no pain - anywhere! No matter what I ate, I could pee pain-free! I cannot express the joy of that simple blessing after so many months of pain. That morning, I started to sing on Twitter!
Thursday, there was still no pain, my mobility and range feel as though I'm once again in my 20's. My heart SINGS with joy and I wanted to reach out and connect with as many brothers and sisters as possible. I told a few that I had no more pain, the ones that knew some of what I've been through.
Yesterday, one of them sent out a praise report - and rightly so. This is something very worthy of a Song to God. I had been truly delivered from pain; I've been healed. There is no science or other means I can explain this. I will go to the doctors with the report, but I should also share this story as well.
Miracles do happen
With little faith
Like a mustard seed
- ESA

Friday, April 6, 2012

A Passover / Easter Story

Awaiting His Return

Amit was jostled by the crowds near the city gate. Short for her seven years of age, she couldn’t see what the commotion was about, but her young ears caught the exclamation, “He’s returned! Rabbi Yeshua (Jesus) has returned to Jerusalem!” Her heart leapt in joy. He came back! She vividly remembered the last time she saw him; the gentle voice and smile that lit up his eyes as he told stories to the children.

Squirming her way through the myriad thicket of legs, she dodged her way through the crowd, toward home. Dashing headlong across the small courtyard, she threw all her weight against the heavy wooden door to open it, stumbling into the cool dark interior.

Rushing to the hearth where two small bread loaves cooled from the morning’s baking, she carefully wrapped the better of the pair in a clean cloth. Cradling the still-warm loaf, she stepped out of the two-room home into the bright desert sunlight, pulling the door closed behind her.

She ran through Jerusalem’s narrow streets back to the gate, but the crowd was gone, leaving only dust motes sparkling in the sunlight. With a rising panic, she glanced around and discovered a path of palm branches strewn in the street, clearly indicating the procession’s direction. Green branches crunched under her worn leather sandals as she panted up that street. The scent of newly cut palms rose from the dust, mingling with the scents of humanity and animals common to the city of her birth.

When she finally caught up with them, Yeshua was dismounting the young donkey he rode into the city, and a great crowd of followers and curious onlookers gathered. Using her small stature to advantage, she clutched the loaf close to her heart and ducked between the people, pushing her way to the front where he stood. When one of his followers stopped her, Yeshua spied her and said she could come forward. With reverence and the unconscious grace only the young can exhibit, she approached smiling and held out her gift. “Here, Rabbi, it’s the first I’ve ever made!”

The cloth was now dusty from its journey, but warm to his fingertips as he accepted it; the aroma of fresh baked bread drifted out from the folds to greet his nose. He smiled kindly with twinkling eyes and lowered himself on one knee, meeting her gaze levelly. “Thank you, Amit.”

“I’m glad you came back, Rabbi Yeshua. I knew you would return to Jerusalem.”

His smile broadened and he placed his hand lovingly on her slim shoulder. “I tell you this, child. I will always return to those who believe.”

She grinned back and replied, “Thank you, Rabbi.” She bestowed a kiss on his bearded cheek and then simply turned and pushed her way back through the crowd towards her awaiting chores.

The following days passed in bliss; she rushed through chores as her father attended Yeshua’s teachings. Then she gathered with the other children to hear wondrous stories. At night, her family listened as their father recounted Yeshua’s teachings.

Four days after the memorable entrance, she helped her mother clean and prepare their home for the Pesach (Passover). She loved this holiday and even helped bake the matzoh and set the Seder Plate for that first night. Her father read from the Haggadah (Exodus) and asked the youngest child the traditional questions, starting with “Why is this night different?” The family prayed together and sang the familiar songs, eating with the dishes reserved for this special holiday. While she hunted for the Afikomen with her younger siblings, Amit wondered where Yeshua celebrated the Seder that night, and how long he would be in Jerusalem.

The next day arrived with a tumult in the streets. Her father departed early and returned quickly, demanding that she stay home with her siblings. “Do not even venture beyond our gate, Amit,” he admonished, knowing her tendency to be headstrong.

“Honor your father’s wishes, Amit,” her mother added as she draped her head-covering over her head and shoulders, following her husband down the street.

With her mother gone, she drew the water, tended the fire, baked the matzoh, ground the grain into flour, and other household tasks she could do. Her curiosity grew as the hours passed. At one point, she heard a great crowd moving through the city. Laboring to get the ladder against their home, she clambered onto the rooftop. But the crowd was too distant to see anything of interest as it traveled down the hill and out the gate. The girl sighed disappointed and returned to her chores.

Three hours later, she shivered and looked up from the small grinder in her lap. The sky had grown ominously dark, moreso because sunset was three hours away. Fearing a storm, she told her siblings to shutter the windows. She also prayed to God that if the storm was bad, her parents would find shelter; they were away a long time.

Gathering the grinder and bowls with wheat kernels and flour, she started across the courtyard. But before she reached the doorway, the ground violently shook, throwing her to her knees; bowls and grinder clattered to the ground, spilling her day’s work. Heedless of the loss, she shouted to her siblings above the unknown roar and frightening shifting and explosions of stone and mortar from the surrounding buildings as though she suddenly found herself beneath a giant’s grinding stone.

Hearing dismayed cries, she pulled herself to her feet and stumbled over heaving ground to the doorframe, bracing herself there. Her two siblings inside clung to each other, crying with wide, terrified eyes. Maintaining her grip on the doorpost just below the Mezuzah, Amit threw an outstretched hand toward them and grabbed a sleeve, yanking the pair through the door with a strength she did not know she possessed.

As the three tumbled to the ground, the earthquake ended as abruptly as it started. An eerie silence surrounded them; their coughing exceedingly loud in the air thick with dust under a dark, ominous sky. As the event began to register in her seven-year-old mind, she clung to her siblings and wept with them.

Not long after, their parents scrambled up the rubble-strewn street, entering their courtyard. Relieved to find their children alive and their home relatively intact, both parents clutched their offspring to their breasts and thanked God.

After a while, Amit found her voice and asked, “What happened, Abba?”

Her father gently grasped both her hands, meeting her curious gaze. “Today they crucified Rabbi Yeshua.”

She stood there, shaking her head wordlessly; silent tears streamed down her dusty cheeks. She mouthed the words “No” and “Why” but no sound escaped past the lump in her throat.

He embraced her, stroking her hair as the words sank in. After a few moments, she snuffled and pulled her head back, asking, “But Rabbi Yeshua will return, won’t he?”

He gently shook his head, tears welling in his own eyes. “He’s gone, child. He died today.”

“But… But he said he’ll always return to those who believe…. He said so….” The last words were a whisper fading into the dusty silence.

He tried to draw his distraught daughter back into his embrace, but she pulled away. With all the determination she could muster, she marched to the side of their home and uprighted the fallen ladder, climbing back onto the rooftop.

Shaking his head, he mounted the ladder and poked his head above the roofline. The child stared toward the city gate through which Yeshua was escorted to Golgotha. Evening fell early under the dark sky, but there was an inner light shining in his young daughter’s eyes. He gently asked, “What are you looking for, Amit?”

“I’m watching for Rabbi Yeshua’s return, Abba.” she quietly replied.

Tears rolled over his cheeks into his beard as he climbed onto the rooftop, standing beside her. Wordlessly, he placed his hand on her slim shoulder, watching with her as the environs slowly grew darker. Sunset approached; it was time for his wife to light the candles and for them to recite the Kiddush. He helped his daughter down from the roof and inside.

All through the Shabbat (Sabbath), Amit was quieter than usual, much quieter. She was deep in thought with a determined look that never left her features.

When the first three stars appeared that evening, she approached her father, “Rabbi Yeshua has been gone for over a day now,” she started matter-of-factly. “He’ll be hungry. Let’s prepare some food we can leave out for him to eat when he returns.”

Her mother was about to countermand her wishes, but her father solemnly nodded his assent. She practically skipped to the chicken coup in the courtyard, gathering the eggs to boil. As the hearth fire cooked the eggs and slowly heated the baking stones, she helped her mother prepare the matzoh and the evening’s meal.

A few hours later, Amit wrapped a warm shawl around her head and shoulders and gathered the basket containing a skin of wine, the hard-boiled eggs and matzoh. Her father held a lit lamp aloft, illuminating the dark road before them.

While she had been out after dark before, for some unknown reason this night felt different, and her skin pimpled with a chill as the words of the first Pesach question echoed through her mind, *Why is this night different?*

The familiar streets and known lamps in their stands, as well as the flickering light in the unshuttered windows and open doorways did not appear changed, but it felt as though she was seeing it all for the first time.

He escorted her down several streets; the aromas of the evening meals and fresh-baked matzoh filled the early night air, mingling with the scents of woodsmoke and heated lamp oil. Those scents faded as they exited through the city gates lit by smoking torches and made their way into a nearby garden.

There he paused and placed a firm hand on her shoulder, turning her to face him. “Child, I’m taking you to the place where they laid the body of Rabbi Yeshua after he died on the cross.”

She nodded gravely; her determination only growing stronger. So he gestured with the lamp which path they should take. In a quiet part of the garden, there was a freshly-hewn tomb with a large stone rolled before the entrance, sealing it shut. Two bored guards entertained themselves with a dice game under the light of fluttering torches on poles to one side.

Her father gestured for silence and took the basket from her, passing her the lamp while indicating that she should hide its flame. Hugging the ground, he slowly and carefully made his way along the rocky outcropping opposite where the guards sat. Still several feet from the tomb, he gently placed the basket in a nearby bush and quietly retreated to his daughter’s side. Firmly grasping her hand, he led her quickly away from the guards.

When they were a safe distance, she returned the lamp and whispered, “Did you leave the basket where Rabbi Yeshua would find it, Abba?”

He smiled and squeezed her hand reassuringly. “Child, if God in his wisdom led a serving woman to find the infant Moses in his basket among the river reeds, I’m certain God can help Rabbi Yeshua find that basket we left for him.”

She studied his face in the lamplight as they walked quickly. “You believe Rabbi Yeshua will return too, Abba.” It was not a question.

He paused and lowered himself to one knee, meeting her gaze levelly. “Amit, my daughter, I have heard of the many wonders Rabbi Yeshua has done. I believe he was, indeed, sent by God to our people. If he told you he’d return, perhaps… just perhaps he will. We shall see.”

He stood upright, affectionately squeezed her hand in his and together they headed home in mutual peace and understanding through the night air filled with Pesach songs.

In the darkness before the dawn, someone gently touched Amit’s cheek, awakening her from a deep sleep. A soft voice whispered in her ear, “Be quiet, child, and come outside.”

Careful not to disturb her siblings sleeping in the same bed beside her, she slipped out from under the warm covers and shivered in the chill desert night air. Barefooted, she left the sleeping room and padded across the main room past the banked hearth fire and out the open door.

Under a moon only days past its full face, Yeshua stood smiling at her as he stood there in brilliantly white robes. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and drew her unkempt hair away from her face. “Rabbi? Is that you?” she whispered.

His teeth showed clearly in his beard as he grinned broadly. “It is I, Amit,” he whispered back. He held out the empty basket. “Thank you for your gift.”

She accepted the basket and was about to reach up to bestow a kiss upon his cheek, but he stepped back. “Touch me not, child, for I have yet to go to my Father.”

She pouted. “You are leaving Jerusalem again?”

“For a time, but I will Return to those who believe. I will always return.” With another smile and a friendly wave, he passed through the courtyard gate.

Racing to the gateway, she looked up and down their street, but he was nowhere in sight. Closing the gate, she clutched the basket to her heart and told herself, “He’ll return someday, and I’ll be waiting.”


-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

-ESA

An Easter Story

Innocence of Eggs

The fat hen opened one eye and glared at her husband, “What’s a-a-all that ru-ru-ruckus?” she clucked.

The rooster pulled his head out from under his wing and stretched his neck toward the wall. “I’ll g-g-go see,” he replied and fluffed his feathers against the cool desert night.

With a few awkward flaps, he crested the stone and mortar wall and looked down into the courtyard. “I-i-i-it looks as i-i-if they’re br-br-bringing a cr-cr-criminal to the high pr-pr-priest,” he reported to his wife.

Before he could turn around to return to their warm nest, the hen was beside him, feathers equally fluffed against the coolness.

“Th-th-the eggs!” the rooster reprimanded.

The hen shrugged and stretched her neck as far as it could go toward the gathering crowd. “I wa-wa-want to see this,” she hissed in reply.

The majority of the crowd moved into the building, but a number of people remained outside in the courtyard, building a charcoal fire to keep warm. While the gathering outside remained peacefully quiet, there was a rising ruckus within the building.

The rooster fluttered to an open window to witness the scene inside. The sounds of buffets and cries of “Prophesy!” drifted through the window where the cockerel sat, the glint of battle and bloodlust sparkling in his eyes.

At that moment, a woman left the building on some errand. Spotting the small group gathered near the fire, she eyed one of them closely and remarked, “You also were with Yeshua (Jesus) of Nazareth.”

The man shook his head vehemently, shrugging his head deeper into his head-cloth. “I neither know nor understand what you are saying,” he replied.

Seeing a seed of potential for more conflict and violence, the rooster alighted onto the courtyard wall and crowed, “His words are tr-tr-tr-tr-TRUE!”

The hen was shocked. She knew as well as her husband that those words were a lie. Could his desire for a fight drive him to this?

She kept silent, for she didn’t want the fight brought to her nest. What would her friends and neighbors say? No, it’s best to stay silent and let the fight go on elsewhere. She turned her attention back to the group around the fire.

The woman had now turned to the others around the fire; gesturing to the man she had spoken to and said, “This is one of them.”

Again, the man denied it.

By now the rooster was hopping from foot to foot; a wicked gleam in his eyes as he watched the scene unfold below.

One of the others turned toward the man and added, “Surely you are one of them, for you are also a Galilean.”

The accused man began to curse and swear at the others gathered around the fire. “I do NOT know this man you are talking about!” he shouted at them.

With glee, the rooster tossed up his head and crowed again, “His words are tr-tr-tr-tr-TRUE!”

And the hen remained silent.

Upon hearing the rooster’s crow a second time, the man paused as if poleaxed and then broke down and wept, fleeing from the courtyard in tears.

The rooster and hen did not see what became of that man, nor of any of the others gathered around the fire, nor of those still inside the building. For at that moment, an angel of the Lord wrapped in the brilliance of Heaven appeared before them both.

Turning wrathful eyes to the rooster, the angel proclaimed, “Because you have crowed such blasphemy not once, but twice, you shall not live to see another sunrise.”

Then the angel’s glare fixed upon the hen. “Because you knew his words were false and you did NOTHING and said NOTHING, you shall also never see another morning.”

In her horror, the hen finally remembered her nest of eggs cooling in the night air. “I-i-i-if I go, wh-wh-who will ca-ca-care for our ch-ch-chicks? Wi-wi-without one of us he-he-here, how wi-wi-will they sur-sur-survive?”

The angel’s eyes moved to where the nest lay at the foot of the courtyard wall, and the wrath in those eyes became tempered with mercy. “Your chicks are innocent of these crimes. The children should not bear the burden of the sins of the parent. So I will take these with me and they will be kept safe.”

With these words, the angel gathered up the eggs, nest and all and vanished. Where they went, neither hen nor rooster knew, for they did not see the next sunrise.

But we know what became of those eggs.

For you see, on the very next Sunday morning, a very special One walked out of a lonely tomb into the rosy light just before sunrise.

Nearby, a rabbit was nibbling quietly on some greens. This rabbit paused and shyly approached Him. The fact that His feet were pierced, as were the hands that lovingly petting it, did not disturb this rabbit at all.

He smiled and said to the rabbit, “Because you are the very first of My Father’s creatures to greet me this day, I have a very special task I will ask of you."

As He straightened, an angel appeared at His side. In his hands, the angel held the nest full of eggs, but this time additional branches had been added to the nest, woven in an arc over it. This handle enabled one to carry the nest as a basket, gently keeping the eggs safe.

He took the basket from the angel and handed it to the rabbit saying, “The world is full of children as innocent as these eggs. I ask that you bring these eggs to the children everywhere. Do this every year, in memory of this morning.

"In their joy of innocence, they know Me. But as their innocence fades, they must strive to seek Me, for the world will try to hide Me from their eyes. So you must hide the eggs so the children must seek them. Perhaps in this way, when their innocence fades, they will remember these mornings and seek me with the same enthusiasm and joy in their hearts. Do this in memory of Me.”

__________________________________________________________________

The above story is free for all to copy/share, provided you do not make any profit from it nor change it in any way.

- ESA

Egg Hunt - Take 2

A few years ago when my nieces had become teenagers, my sister-in-law embarked on a major change in their Easter morning tradition. Instead of hiding plastic eggs with candy or coins, she decided to hide something more meaningful to them - their electronics! She pilfered their cell phones, the remotes to the video games, their hand-held games, their iPods, the TV and DVD remotes, the computer mouse and power supply... everything that made noise, took batteries and otherwise left them lost in their own world.
Her initial intent was to give herself some peace and quiet Easter morning while the kids grumbled to hunt down where she had hidden their "treasures." With three kids and a husband serving in the middle east, she needed the treasured quiet too.
But there was something of more value that arose from this little idea. First, why are their electronic do-dads their "treasures"? In fact, why do kids hunt for chocolate, candy and plastic eggs allegedly hidden by a rabbit? Easter is about Christ's overcoming the cross and His Resurrection. Is HE not the treasure we should seek Easter morning?
Another discovery the family quickly discovered, the joy of spending some time together - away from the electronic distractions we have in this world. More and more often, I've been hearing stories of how people "unplug" from the internet and iPhones, how they've discovered the benefits of slowing down their life, interacting with others face-to-face, and seeing the sunset or sunrise in person instead of via webcam or while on the road. This was the first time in their young lives when they were truly unplugged, and they discovered - after the traumatic (and melodramatic) withdrawal from technology - they enjoyed spending time with each other ~ together.
Perhaps that is an Easter tradition many should start. Hide the technology and enjoy the moments shared face-to-face with each other.
Happy Hunting!
Happy Easter
Blessings to you all!
- ESA

Sunrise Service (Poem)

Each Easter, regardless of with which family my husband and I celebrate, a tradition is to drive out to the remote corner of southeastern Connecticut and help my mother-in-law's Congregational Church with the breakfast following Sunrise Service on Easter morning. It's a tradition I've grown to enjoy, far more than watching nieces and nephews with their egg hunts when they were young. Two years ago, I wrote a poem sharing some of my experience with this. As I'll be there once again this Sunday, it's time to reshare...

Sunrise Service

Awake before the hours
of pre-dawn light
I don my work clothes
with much delight

Before the eastern horizon
is touched by the sun
Driven to a New England church
my in-laws and I have done

Before small children have started
their annual egg hunt
Cartons of eggs, ham and equipment
were hauled by this runt

Let's not forget one important part
We also started up the coffee pot

Eggs were scrambled
ham was baked
Kitchen crew was busy
make no mistake

From set-up to break-down
and all all in between
We were an efficient crew
left every thing clean

But when it came time
and there was no praise
Some felt we deserve...

The true message
of that day reminds us... 
We are all called to Serve

- ESA

Birdsong!

I was awake early and heard the first hesitant calls of a bird outside my window a little before 4:30 this morning.


While many know the joys (and sometimes annoyance when one is trying to sleep in) of birdsong right outside their bedroom window, I think that New England springs spotlight it all the more for me.


In winter, there is a silence so profound you can hear falling snow softly whisper through bare tree branches, or a distant rumble-crunch of the snow plow as it trundles down Main Street. Mornings, especially in the hours before the commuter's cars and school buses, are very still and quiet.


Then spring arrives, and with it, a great multitude of birds migrate back to the area. And they bring such sweet birdsong! There is even a tradition in the Northeastern US that "It ain't Spring until you've seen your first redbreast robin."


And what was once still silence has turned into a beautiful melody greeting the morning sun, celebrating the return of life, warmth and growth.


By the Autumn, I may be among those who scowl at the birds keeping me from my sleep, but in the Spring, I bless their little hearts as my joins theirs in sweet song of life!


Sing
for
Spring

-ESA

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Awaiting His Return (Story)

Here is a Passover/Easter story that starts on Palm Sunday. Please feel free to copy/share.

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Amit was jostled by the crowds near the city gate. Short for her seven years of age, she couldn’t see what the commotion was about, but her young ears caught the exclamation, “He’s returned! Rabbi Yeshua (Jesus) has returned to Jerusalem!” Her heart leapt in joy. He came back! She vividly remembered the last time she saw him; the gentle voice and smile that lit up his eyes as he told stories to the children.

Squirming her way through the myriad thicket of legs, she dodged her way through the crowd, toward home. Dashing headlong across the small courtyard, she threw all her weight against the heavy wooden door to open it, stumbling into the cool dark interior.

Rushing to the hearth where two small bread loaves cooled from the morning’s baking, she carefully wrapped the better of the pair in a clean cloth. Cradling the still-warm loaf, she stepped out of the two-room home into the bright desert sunlight, pulling the door closed behind her.

She ran through Jerusalem’s narrow streets back to the gate, but the crowd was gone, leaving only dust motes sparkling in the sunlight. With a rising panic, she glanced around and discovered a path of palm branches strewn in the street, clearly indicating the procession’s direction. Green branches crunched under her worn leather sandals as she panted up that street. The scent of newly cut palms rose from the dust, mingling with the scents of humanity and animals common to the city of her birth.

When she finally caught up with them, Yeshua was dismounting the young donkey he rode into the city, and a great crowd of followers and curious onlookers gathered. Using her small stature to advantage, she clutched the loaf close to her heart and ducked between the people, pushing her way to the front where he stood. When one of his followers stopped her, Yeshua spied her and said she could come forward. With reverence and the unconscious grace only the young can exhibit, she approached smiling and held out her gift. “Here, Rabbi, it’s the first I’ve ever made!”

The cloth was now dusty from its journey, but warm to his fingertips as he accepted it; the aroma of fresh baked bread drifted out from the folds to greet his nose. He smiled kindly with twinkling eyes and lowered himself on one knee, meeting her gaze levelly. “Thank you, Amit.”

“I’m glad you came back, Rabbi Yeshua. I knew you would return to Jerusalem.”

His smile broadened and he placed his hand lovingly on her slim shoulder. “I tell you this, child. I will always return to those who believe.”

She grinned back and replied, “Thank you, Rabbi.” She bestowed a kiss on his bearded cheek and then simply turned and pushed her way back through the crowd towards her awaiting chores.

The following days passed in bliss; she rushed through chores as her father attended Yeshua’s teachings. Then she gathered with the other children to hear wondrous stories. At night, her family listened as their father recounted Yeshua’s teachings.

Four days after the memorable entrance, she helped her mother clean and prepare their home for the Pesach (Passover). She loved this holiday and even helped bake the matzoh and set the Seder Plate for that first night. Her father read from the Haggadah (Exodus) and asked the youngest child the traditional questions, starting with “Why is this night different?” The family prayed together and sang the familiar songs, eating with the dishes reserved for this special holiday. While she hunted for the Afikomen with her younger siblings, Amit wondered where Yeshua celebrated the Seder that night, and how long he would be in Jerusalem.

The next day arrived with a tumult in the streets. Her father departed early and returned quickly, demanding that she stay home with her siblings. “Do not even venture beyond our gate, Amit,” he admonished, knowing her tendency to be headstrong.

“Honor your father’s wishes, Amit,” her mother added as she draped her head-covering over her head and shoulders, following her husband down the street.

With her mother gone, she drew the water, tended the fire, baked the matzoh, ground the grain into flour, and other household tasks she could do. Her curiosity grew as the hours passed. At one point, she heard a great crowd moving through the city. Laboring to get the ladder against their home, she clambered onto the rooftop. But the crowd was too distant to see anything of interest as it traveled down the hill and out the gate. The girl sighed disappointed and returned to her chores.

Three hours later, she shivered and looked up from the small grinder in her lap. The sky had grown ominously dark, moreso because sunset was three hours away. Fearing a storm, she told her siblings to shutter the windows. She also prayed to God that if the storm was bad, her parents would find shelter; they were away a long time.

Gathering the grinder and bowls with wheat kernels and flour, she started across the courtyard. But before she reached the doorway, the ground violently shook, throwing her to her knees; bowls and grinder clattered to the ground, spilling her day’s work. Heedless of the loss, she shouted to her siblings above the unknown roar and frightening shifting and explosions of stone and mortar from the surrounding buildings as though she suddenly found herself beneath a giant’s grinding stone.

Hearing dismayed cries, she pulled herself to her feet and stumbled over heaving ground to the doorframe, bracing herself there. Her two siblings inside clung to each other, crying with wide, terrified eyes. Maintaining her grip on the doorpost just below the Mezuzah, Amit threw an outstretched hand toward them and grabbed a sleeve, yanking the pair through the door with a strength she did not know she possessed.

As the three tumbled to the ground, the earthquake ended as abruptly as it started. An eerie silence surrounded them; their coughing exceedingly loud in the air thick with dust under a dark, ominous sky. As the event began to register in her seven-year-old mind, she clung to her siblings and wept with them.

Not long after, their parents scrambled up the rubble-strewn street, entering their courtyard. Relieved to find their children alive and their home relatively intact, both parents clutched their offspring to their breasts and thanked God.

After a while, Amit found her voice and asked, “What happened, Abba?”

Her father gently grasped both her hands, meeting her curious gaze. “Today they crucified Rabbi Yeshua.”

She stood there, shaking her head wordlessly; silent tears streamed down her dusty cheeks. She mouthed the words “No” and “Why” but no sound escaped past the lump in her throat.

He embraced her, stroking her hair as the words sank in. After a few moments, she snuffled and pulled her head back, asking, “But Rabbi Yeshua will return, won’t he?”

He gently shook his head, tears welling in his own eyes. “He’s gone, child. He died today.”

“But… But he said he’ll always return to those who believe…. He said so….” The last words were a whisper fading into the dusty silence.

He tried to draw his distraught daughter back into his embrace, but she pulled away. With all the determination she could muster, she marched to the side of their home and uprighted the fallen ladder, climbing back onto the rooftop.

Shaking his head, he mounted the ladder and poked his head above the roofline. The child stared toward the city gate through which Yeshua was escorted to Golgotha. Evening fell early under the dark sky, but there was an inner light shining in his young daughter’s eyes. He gently asked, “What are you looking for, Amit?”

“I’m watching for Rabbi Yeshua’s return, Abba.” she quietly replied.

Tears rolled over his cheeks into his beard as he climbed onto the rooftop, standing beside her. Wordlessly, he placed his hand on her slim shoulder, watching with her as the environs slowly grew darker. Sunset approached; it was time for his wife to light the candles and for them to recite the Kiddush. He helped his daughter down from the roof and inside.

All through the Shabbat (Sabbath), Amit was quieter than usual, much quieter. She was deep in thought with a determined look that never left her features.

When the first three stars appeared that evening, she approached her father, “Rabbi Yeshua has been gone for over a day now,” she started matter-of-factly. “He’ll be hungry. Let’s prepare some food we can leave out for him to eat when he returns.”

Her mother was about to countermand her wishes, but her father solemnly nodded his assent. She practically skipped to the chicken coup in the courtyard, gathering the eggs to boil. As the hearth fire cooked the eggs and slowly heated the baking stones, she helped her mother prepare the matzoh and the evening’s meal.

A few hours later, Amit wrapped a warm shawl around her head and shoulders and gathered the basket containing a skin of wine, the hard-boiled eggs and matzoh. Her father held a lit lamp aloft, illuminating the dark road before them.

While she had been out after dark before, for some unknown reason this night felt different, and her skin pimpled with a chill as the words of the first Pesach question echoed through her mind, *Why is this night different?*

The familiar streets and known lamps in their stands, as well as the flickering light in the unshuttered windows and open doorways did not appear changed, but it felt as though she was seeing it all for the first time.

He escorted her down several streets; the aromas of the evening meals and fresh-baked matzoh filled the early night air, mingling with the scents of woodsmoke and heated lamp oil. Those scents faded as they exited through the city gates lit by smoking torches and made their way into a nearby garden.

There he paused and placed a firm hand on her shoulder, turning her to face him. “Child, I’m taking you to the place where they laid the body of Rabbi Yeshua after he died on the cross.”

She nodded gravely; her determination only growing stronger. So he gestured with the lamp which path they should take. In a quiet part of the garden, there was a freshly-hewn tomb with a large stone rolled before the entrance, sealing it shut. Two bored guards entertained themselves with a dice game under the light of fluttering torches on poles to one side.

Her father gestured for silence and took the basket from her, passing her the lamp while indicating that she should hide its flame. Hugging the ground, he slowly and carefully made his way along the rocky outcropping opposite where the guards sat. Still several feet from the tomb, he gently placed the basket in a nearby bush and quietly retreated to his daughter’s side. Firmly grasping her hand, he led her quickly away from the guards.

When they were a safe distance, she returned the lamp and whispered, “Did you leave the basket where Rabbi Yeshua would find it, Abba?”

He smiled and squeezed her hand reassuringly. “Child, if God in his wisdom led a serving woman to find the infant Moses in his basket among the river reeds, I’m certain God can help Rabbi Yeshua find that basket we left for him.”

She studied his face in the lamplight as they walked quickly. “You believe Rabbi Yeshua will return too, Abba.” It was not a question.

He paused and lowered himself to one knee, meeting her gaze levelly. “Amit, my daughter, I have heard of the many wonders Rabbi Yeshua has done. I believe he was, indeed, sent by God to our people. If he told you he’d return, perhaps… just perhaps he will. We shall see.”

He stood upright, affectionately squeezed her hand in his and together they headed home in mutual peace and understanding through the night air filled with Pesach songs.

In the darkness before the dawn, someone gently touched Amit’s cheek, awakening her from a deep sleep. A soft voice whispered in her ear, “Be quiet, child, and come outside.”

Careful not to disturb her siblings sleeping in the same bed beside her, she slipped out from under the warm covers and shivered in the chill desert night air. Barefooted, she left the sleeping room and padded across the main room past the banked hearth fire and out the open door.

Under a moon only days past its full face, Yeshua stood smiling at her as he stood there in brilliantly white robes. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and drew her unkempt hair away from her face. “Rabbi? Is that you?” she whispered.

His teeth showed clearly in his beard as he grinned broadly. “It is I, Amit,” he whispered back. He held out the empty basket. “Thank you for your gift.”

She accepted the basket and was about to reach up to bestow a kiss upon his cheek, but he stepped back. “Touch me not, child, for I have yet to go to my Father.”

She pouted. “You are leaving Jerusalem again?”

“For a time, but I will Return to those who believe. I will always return.” With another smile and a friendly wave, he passed through the courtyard gate.

Racing to the gateway, she looked up and down their street, but he was nowhere in sight. Closing the gate, she clutched the basket to her heart and told herself, “He’ll return someday, and I’ll be waiting.”

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-ESA

Christ's Love (Video)

This is the last of the old videos I'll post today. (Yes I have others too). This one is a bit more upbeat and one from my generation. :D

Song: Falling in Love with You - Erasure
Images: from the internet

All rights are retained by the respective artists.

Bridge Over Troubled Waters (Video)

Since I've started posting some of my old videos, here's another one that fits this season:

Song: Bridge Over Troubled Waters - Simon & Garfunkel
Images: Found over the internet

All rights remain with the original artists. 

Father to Son (Video)

This is a video I made years ago, but had to eventually remove from YouTube because I do not own the rights to the song. It started as a conversation between my husband and I. He knows this song from its original debut decades ago. To me, though, the words sounded as what God would say to Yeshua/Jesus just before His crucifixion.

Song: Day is Done - Peter, Paul and Mary
Images: Photobucket


All rights are retained by the respective artists. I do not, nor ever have, received funds for this. I produced this out of the Love in my heart.

- ESA

Innocence of Eggs (Story)

The fat hen opened one eye and glared at her husband, “What’s a-a-all that ru-ru-ruckus?” she clucked.

The rooster pulled his head out from under his wing and stretched his neck toward the wall. “I’ll g-g-go see,” he replied and fluffed his feathers against the cool desert night.

With a few awkward flaps, he crested the stone and mortar wall and looked down into the courtyard. “I-i-i-it looks as i-i-if they’re br-br-bringing a cr-cr-criminal to the high pr-pr-priest,” he reported to his wife.

Before he could turn around to return to their warm nest, the hen was beside him, feathers equally fluffed against the coolness.

“Th-th-the eggs!” the rooster reprimanded.

The hen shrugged and stretched her neck as far as it could go toward the gathering crowd. “I wa-wa-want to see this,” she hissed in reply.

The majority of the crowd moved into the building, but a number of people remained outside in the courtyard, building a charcoal fire to keep warm. While the gathering outside remained peacefully quiet, there was a rising ruckus within the building.

The rooster fluttered to an open window to witness the scene inside. The sounds of buffets and cries of “Prophesy!” drifted through the window where the cockerel sat, the glint of battle and bloodlust sparkling in his eyes.

At that moment, a woman left the building on some errand. Spotting the small group gathered near the fire, she eyed one of them closely and remarked, “You also were with Yeshua (Jesus) of Nazareth.”

The man shook his head vehemently, shrugging his head deeper into his head-cloth. “I neither know nor understand what you are saying,” he replied.

Seeing a seed of potential for more conflict and violence, the rooster alighted onto the courtyard wall and crowed, “His words are tr-tr-tr-tr-TRUE!”

The hen was shocked. She knew as well as her husband that those words were a lie. Could his desire for a fight drive him to this?

She kept silent, for she didn’t want the fight brought to her nest. What would her friends and neighbors say? No, it’s best to stay silent and let the fight go on elsewhere. She turned her attention back to the group around the fire.

The woman had now turned to the others around the fire; gesturing to the man she had spoken to and said, “This is one of them.”

Again, the man denied it.

By now the rooster was hopping from foot to foot; a wicked gleam in his eyes as he watched the scene unfold below.

One of the others turned toward the man and added, “Surely you are one of them, for you are also a Galilean.”

The accused man began to curse and swear at the others gathered around the fire. “I do NOT know this man you are talking about!” he shouted at them.

With glee, the rooster tossed up his head and crowed again, “His words are tr-tr-tr-tr-TRUE!”

And the hen remained silent.

Upon hearing the rooster’s crow a second time, the man paused as if poleaxed and then broke down and wept, fleeing from the courtyard in tears.

The rooster and hen did not see what became of that man, nor of any of the others gathered around the fire, nor of those still inside the building. For at that moment, an angel of the Lord wrapped in the brilliance of Heaven appeared before them both.

Turning wrathful eyes to the rooster, the angel proclaimed, “Because you have crowed such blasphemy not once, but twice, you shall not live to see another sunrise.”

Then the angel’s glare fixed upon the hen. “Because you knew his words were false and you did NOTHING and said NOTHING, you shall also never see another morning.”

In her horror, the hen finally remembered her nest of eggs cooling in the night air. “I-i-i-if I go, wh-wh-who will ca-ca-care for our ch-ch-chicks? Wi-wi-without one of us he-he-here, how wi-wi-will they sur-sur-survive?”

The angel’s eyes moved to where the nest lay at the foot of the courtyard wall, and the wrath in those eyes became tempered with mercy. “Your chicks are innocent of these crimes. The children should not bear the burden of the sins of the parent. So I will take these with me and they will be kept safe.”

With these words, the angel gathered up the eggs, nest and all and vanished. Where they went, neither hen nor rooster knew, for they did not see the next sunrise.

But we know what became of those eggs.

For you see, on the very next Sunday morning, a very special Man walked out of a lonely tomb into the rosy light just before sunrise.

Nearby, a rabbit was nibbling quietly on some greens. This rabbit paused and shyly approached this Man. The fact that the feet of this Man had holes, as did the hands that lovingly petting it, did not disturb this rabbit at all.

The Man smiled and said to the rabbit, “Because you are the very first of My Father’s creatures to greet me this day, I have a very special task I will ask of you."

As the Man straightened, an angel appeared at His side. In his hands, the angel held the nest full of eggs, but this time additional branches had been added to the nest, woven in an arc over it. This handle enabled one to carry the nest as a basket, gently keeping the eggs safe.

The Man took the basket and handed it to the rabbit saying, “The world is full of children as innocent as these eggs. I ask that you bring these eggs to the children everywhere. Do this every year, in memory of this morning.

"In their joy of innocence, they know Me. But as their innocence fades, they must strive to seek Me, for the world will try to hide Me from their eyes. So you must hide the eggs so the children must seek them. Perhaps in this way, when their innocence fades, they will remember these mornings and seek me with the same enthusiasm and joy in their hearts. Do this in memory of Me.”

__________________________________________________________________

The above story is free for all to copy/share, provided you do not make any profit from it nor change it in any way.

- ESA